Lizzie’s Fertility Soapbox Rant.
So, you want to start trying to have a baby? That is very exciting and as the months go by can become stressful. Before you do anything else – ANYTHING ELSE – go to the doctor ladies. Go get your blood work done AND get your OB to order your husband a Sperm Analysis. Be proactive. Don’t waste you or your partners time. Just do it.
The blood work is mainly covered by health insurance, but even if it is not – it’s worth it. The sperm analysis may also be covered ($150-$200), but it’s worth it. Find out early if there is something that you need to change (maybe his diet, maybe something on the female side.)
DO NOT WASTE A YEAR before doing these two things. When you get your blood work (hormone levels) checked it is an indicator that you MAY be normal and to go ahead and try to have a baby. When he gets a SA and it comes back normal, you know things are good. If either of these comes back abnormal – you have not wasted any time.
This is my ONE regret over the past 2 years. I did not do the basic testing to make sure we were both ok. After a full year of trying to get pregnant we found out it was physically impossible for us to do so. I wasted an entire year. I wish my OB would have offered these simple tests when we started trying and I could have avoided the monthly roller coaster.
Will I go back to my OB? Probably not. I was 33 finally starting to try to have a baby. I wish she would have asked me if I wanted to be proactive. Not just sent me on my way with a pat on the back and a “good luck”. Never again will I be passive. I will ask for testing. I will get data. I will not be a “normal” patient. I want to be aggressive and not just “wait and see”.
Take my one regret was not being proactive. Learn from my mistakes and get tested. If your doctor says no and that you should really see how it goes for six months, FIND A NEW DOCTOR. You decide what is best for you and your family. Find a doctor that supports you.
Final thought: GET TESTED BEFORE YOU START TRYING TO HAVE A BABY.
The end of Lizzie’s rant.
Love and Hugs, Lizzie
So I tried to comment earlier and it didn't publish- so here's another try. I totally understand the frustration and regret of false (or just delayed) starts and not being proactive and the heartbreak of realizing it just may not happen like you always imagined it would. But, at the risk of being misinterpreted as a rah rah everything happens for a reason person, I will say, without a shadow of a doubt, the babies that I just kissed goodnight are the babies I was meant to mother. And any other egg and sperm combo, no matter where or when they fertilized, would not have led to my two kids. I know well-intentioned words meant to support can hurt, but I hope these encourage. :)
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